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Binge Shopping By Jill Chivers

I was a compulsive over shopper for years.  And for much of that time, I didn’t even realise it.  I thought shopping was a harmless pastime or maybe a contact sport I had become very, very good at. Shopping was my favourite hobby. 

But then something started to change.  My wardrobe was enormous -   I couldn’t squeeze another thing in - and yet I continued to consume, and add more to this bursting-at-the-seams, can-barely-close-the-doors walk in wardrobe. 

Not only was I was buying too much but I was wearing too little.  I had racks and racks of stuff I didn’t need, or even want.  I started to seriously question my buying behaviour.  Why was I buying so much when I already had so much? I had no idea what the answer to that question was.

My turning point moment came when I returned home from a work trip to San Francisco in November 2009, my bags swollen from over $1000 worth of unneeded, ‘justification’ purchases of clothes and accessories.   Why had I bought all this stuff, including 2 pairs of jeans to add to my existing collection of 14 pair and another pair of shoes to take my tally to over 100 pairs?

 Was my shopping out of control?  I wasn’t sure, but I knew something was seriously “off”.  It was time to take drastic action.  It was time (drum roll please) to take a year off from clothes shopping.

On December 15, 2009, I started my year without clothes shopping challenge. No shopping for new clothes, shoes, accessories, handbags, underwear – no shopping at all except for necessities.

In the beginning, I felt a lot of fear and embarrassment.  I mean, who has a problem with shopping, of all things?! It seemed like a ridiculous problem to have.   I didn’t need anyone else to judge me harshly as I was doing a bang up job of that myself.  I didn’t yet understand the extent of compulsive overshopping behaviour in the world (an estimated 10% of the Western world have an addiction to shopping).

 I had many ups and downs during my ‘year’.  I shed a few tears and experienced my share of frustration.  There were moments of self recrimination when I wondered why are you doing this stupid challenge?  What are you trying to prove?  At times, I was listless and directionless and dispirited. It was worse than being back in high school.

 And since I had used shopping as a way to numb those feelings before, I had nowhere to ‘go’ with these unhappy emotions.  It’s a wonder I didn’t turn to drink, watching marathon reruns of Sex & the City or mainlining chocolate. 

What got me through is that I also experienced great grace during my ‘year’.  Flashes of clear insight, feelings of presence and ‘flow’ that confirmed I was on the right path and connections with others that confirmed the richness and purpose to my journey.

My ‘year without clothes shopping’ was a profound and life changing journey.  I learned much about myself, my shopping, my relationships, my failings and talents. 

I no longer feel a compulsion to shop and my life is so full and varied, I can’t imagine wanting to spend a day at the mall.  In fact, few things would be worse than being forced to spend a day in a shopping mall.  Perhaps being forced to wear polka dots, or navy, would be worse.

I still love clothes and style, but now it’s geared more toward ‘shopping my wardrobe’ than shopping in the stores.  I am asked to share my story regularly with entrepreneurs and women’s networks.  I am frequently invited to work with others, to write articles, create videos, and deliver teleseminars and workshops. I have appeared in nearly 50 media stories in Australia, New Zealand, the US and Europe. 

None of this would have been possible without that first step of acknowledgement.  Of stepping into the unknown and the fear, rather than running away from it as fast as my legs would carry me.

The most important thing I have learned – a message I now live – is that life is too important to be spent – life is to be lived. 

About Jill Chivers: Jill Chivers understands the overshopping cycle first hand.  After recovering from her compulsion to overshop, Jill is now an advocate for conscious shopping and has created the world’s first online membership site for other women who want to slay their own shopping dragon and create a healthier relationship to shopping, themselves, their wardrobes and their wallets.  

Jill has appeared in many media stories, talking about compulsive overshopping, including the Today Show, Sunrise, Today Tonight, The Circle, The Morning Show, Triple J, the San Francisco Chronicle, Prevention magazine, the Sunday Herald and the Wall Street Journal. 

Learn more at http://www.shopyourwardrobe.com/

Jill is an official spokesperson and ambassador for Buy Nothing New Month, a global initiative that inspires individuals to become more conscious in their consumption.